Cold Eldritch
Scene 1: A hot summer afternoon in the moonstruck outer limits of Leeds 6.
An old man in a flat cap glances at the sky and mutters darkly about rain coming in from the Pennines. Shaking his head he turns and enters the local pub, the "Ferret's Knackers". The strains of The Clash's "Working for the Clampdown" can be heard briefly as the door swings open. Our camera focuses in on a blackboard advertising forthcoming events: Monday: Dominoes - West Yorkshire Challenge Cup semi-final Two students wander past, by mistake. Scene 2: Hi-Tech laboratory. Lots of suits with "East-West" ID badges sitting around impatiently.
A lab technician in a white coat places a white powder in a test tube and connects it what appears to be a kludged vacuum cleaner. There is a whooshing noise as the white powder is sucked up into a large box with tinted glass panes. There is frost upon the window panes. After a brief pause some really freaky holograms begin to emanante from the black box. At first no discernible shapes can be made out, only a white mist, but after a few moments the figure of a man can be seen through the gloom. He is wearing a black hat. There is a noise like a steam-hammer being driven into your skull. The man's mouth opens, a fissure into a dark, hopeless void. He sings. "I'm gonna make you the biggest star this world has ever seen". The mist begins to swirl into a vortex, and the viewpoint travels, 2001 style, towards an infinitely distant focal point. The steam-hammer noise gradually ebbs and is replaced by a distant echo of some thoroughly wonderful techno. The Chief Suit frowns, snaps his fingers and the lab technician switches off the vacuum cleaner. The hologram seems to whisper "No, no" before it dissolves and fades. The suits, wordlessly, nod to each other and appear pleased as they leave. The frost on the black box has melted a little, allowing us to see within. There is a disembodied head inside. It is wearing shades. "Blimey, that was a bit Goth" the lab technician mumbles to no-one in particular. Scene 3: Upstairs Room, "Ferret's Knackers". 9.30 PM
A thin crowd of bemused locals and anorak-wearing Dominion subscribers stand around. The Black Box has been placed centre-stage and is sucking up a veritable Bondi Beach of white powder at an alarming rate. The holograms are looking great, though, and again there is sound: "Just a little pin-prick, that'll keep you going through the show...". Suddenly our old man from scene 1 decides he's had enough. Throwing his domino set stagewards in disgust he strides out of the pub. Bizarrely, and in slow motion, the dominoes parabolically arc towards the Black Box and strike it a freak blow amidships. The box shatters into a thousand pieces. As the crowd dive for cover, the hologram again changes into a vortex and glorious techno replaces the previous dirge. This time it is stronger and clearer. The hologram grows wings and flies out of an open window. The noise gradually fades as it heads for the Pennines on its way to fill the world, but the remains of the crowd clearly hear a whispered "Yes, yes!" "Good gig" says Pete French, to no-one in particular. [Apologies to Dennis Potter, Alan Plater, and everyone who bothered to read this rubbish] - Chris Sampson
Snapshots in the family album:
· The Fenton
· Joseph's Well
· Joseph’s Well (again)
Created by IJP |